Dark Shadows
by Corie
Summary: What happeneds when Harry's summer and uncle finally get to him? Disaster for all who believed in the Boy Who Lived. ABANDONDED
1. Default Chapter

A/N: PLEASE R/R!!!!!!!! I love reviews! I tried a different angle then any other stories that i've done. This takes place during Harry's 5th year and 4th year SUMMER. It takes place after the GOF. If nobody likes this, then tell me why BUT DON'T BE TOO MEAN CAUSE I DON'T LIKE THAT. If you like it review. If nobody reviews though, I don't think I'll continue. This is more of a test. So, read! AND REMEMBER! HARRY POTTER AND ALL THE CHARACTERS ARE NOT MINE UNLESS I SAY THEY ARE. It's PG-13 just because I wasn't sure and didn't want to underrate it. ok! Read! Thanks!  
  
  
  
The day was gray, just like all the other days. It had been like this ever since Harry had arrived home. He never cried, but sank deeper into sadness His uncle was more terrible then before. He, Harry, was blamed for the money loss that the family was facing. Harry tried ignoring it at first, but his uncle made sure that he would remember. Forever.  
Hedwig knew something was wrong. Harry, however had made her go to Ron's. He didn't trust his uncle and he knew Hedwig would never get enough to eat here. At least Harry never did and he didn't expect any different for his owl.  
After days like these, Harry would lay on his bed for hours wondering why. Why him. Why did he have to live this. Why can't he stay at Hogwarts. Why couldn't he live in a normal house. Why was he cursed with this life?  
He had not responded to any of his friends letters. He didn't want them worrying. Sirius hadn't written yet. Harry figured it was probably for the better. Sirius was having enough problems with Voldermont.  
Voldermont. Another problem with Harry. Voldermont had ruined his life. Harry was still angry after last year. But he blamed himself. He couldn't even blame Voldermont as much as himself. He had stayed up countless nights recalling the events and tearing himself apart. Going through what happened. Wishing he had been killed. Wondering what ifs.  
He knew the what ifs did nothing, but he couldn't stop. It was like an epidemic in his body that he couldn't stop and he wasn't sure if he wanted it to. It was one of the main reasons Harry was in as much sadness as he was.  
"BOY GET YOUR LAZY BUTT DOWN HERE AND CLEAN THE FLOOR!" his uncle called from downstairs. Harry trudged his skinny body down the stairs. He did as his uncle told him but it didn't stop his uncle from kicking him occasionally and spiting on him. Harry ignored most of it. Mostly trying to stay awake. It was 12:30 a.m. and he hadn't slept in two days.   
Harry had lost a lot of weight since his fourth year, and since he was already underweight, it was really terrible. Harry grew but not much. His green eyes had changed too. They were now dark and dull, nothing really shone anymore. He had a scar that lay across his cheek that reminded him of last month when his uncle had cracked a glass over his head and scraped a part across his cheek. Harry hadn't cried.  
Harry watched as his uncle left. Harry continued working, making sure he didn't leave any excuse for his uncle to hurt him anymore then he already did. When he finally finished, it was 2 in the morning and Uncle Vernon was snoring loudly.  
Even his cousin and aunt, Dudley and Aunt Petunia, were scared of the man. They had left two weeks ago during the night. He had hit Dudley some, Petunia more, and Harry was a punching bag. The days were slowly coming to an end. Only another month until he went back. If his uncle let him. If he survived.  
Harry's head drooped onto his pillow and he dreamt. He dreamt the same kind of dreams he had been having all summer. Nightmares. He couldn't escape and it killed him.  
The nightmares were about Voldermont. More plans to kill Harry. Sometimes Harry would sit up and wonder why he just didn't get Harry, kill him, and be over with it. It would make both their lives easier. But no. Voldermont had to do to differently. Torture Harry more.   
Two nights later, Harry got up and got dressed. As soon as he walked downstairs, his uncle grabbed him by his shirt.  
"You don't belong here boy," His uncle said, his face full of anger and breath full of alcohol. Harry turned his head away from the smell but his uncle grabbed his chin and turned him to face him. Then his uncle threw him as hard as he could across the room. The wall connected with Harry and made a loud crunch. Harry had dented the wall slightly.  
Uncle Vernon walked forward in a shaky way, due to the alcohol, and pushed the boy back down as he tried to sit up. Harry cradled his broken arm which had broken when he hit, but his uncle grabbed his hair.  
"Why don't you fight back boy? Scared? Or are you just weak? I think that's it. You are useless boy! Nobody wants you! Do you hear me? NOBODY WANTS YOU NOT EVEN THAT CRACKPOT FOOL THAT KNEW YOUR PARENTS!" spit flew everywhere as he said this in a slur. Harry, too weak, didn't react, the words hardly entering his mind as his uncle kept coming in and out of view.  
"You stay here boy. When I get back don't expect to be here much longer," his uncle kicked him twice in the stomach causing him to wheeze, knowing at least two of his ribs had broken. Then, he left, slamming the door behind him. Harry slowly began to realize what his uncle had meant. Harry knew he was to be dead by tomorrow if his uncle got his way.  
Harry tried lifting himself twice before he was able to stand on his legs. They wobbled underneath him but he stood. He slowly made his way up the stairs trying to go as fast as he could. He didn't know it, but he had a trail of blood that trickled behind him.   
Harry had had enough. Knowing the only way he could survive was if he used magic, Harry grabbed his wand and cloak which he had gotten by mere luck. Harry didn't even bother with everything else, except his Firebolt which he grabbed to for life. Then a door slammed and Harry's heart began to beat forcefully in his chest. He wasn't going to make it. He was going to die.  
"YOU CAN RUN BOY! BUT YOU CANNOT HIDE FROM ME!" Harry heard his uncle yell. Harry heard the loud thumps up the stairs. Harry stood paralyzed in shock at the spot where his uncle slammed open the door. He had his arm raised, gun in hand, pointing straight at Harry. 


	2. Bring It On

A/N: THANK YOU SO MUCH! I didn't think anyone was going to review! Well, this is the next chapter....... I'm writing it as I go, so it might take a little longer for the next chapter to come out because school starts again tomorrow(yippe ::rolls eyes::) I DO NOT OWN ANY HARRY POTTER CHARACTERS. Oh, and if anyone has any suggestions on how to continue the story, I'll take them! Sorry I left ya w/ another cliff hanger....hehe..its not as bad though.....thats what u think....haha  
  
  
  
Harry stood, wide eyed at the gun that was pointed at his heart. Harry was suddenly taken over by the amount of emotions. He was going to die, but he wasn't going to die speechless.  
"Vernon you may hate me but I hate you ten times more! You have no idea what I've been through!" Harry yelled before he could think. His uncle looked ready to kill.  
"What did you call me?" he asked vehnomently. Harry felt himself shake slightly.  
"I called you Vernon. It is your name, isn't it?" Harry yelled. His uncle tightened his grip on the gun and was ready to pull the trigger.  
"Stop mouthing off to me boy! Any last words?" His uncle asked a evil glint held in his eyes. Harry opened his mouth but instead of saying anything, Harry spit on his uncle. That was the last straw for his uncle. He pulled the triggor and Harry felt his shoulder begin to burn. Harry fell to the ground with a loud thump as his hands grasped his shoulder . Blood flooded freely all over the carpet. Harry heard his uncle's car speed away. Funny, he hadn't heard his uncle even leave.   
Harry groaned and felt one tear fall down his cheek. The pain was sweeping over his entire body. Harry moaned and shakily stood. He stood with a hard cold glint in his eye. A hint of pain shone though it was bearly visable because of the anger that radiated from the green eyes.  
He steadily grabbed his wand, cloak and Firebolt again. He walked down the stairs holding onto the railing for strength as he walked down. He was breathing heavily feeling as though he could collapse at any moment. He lifted his arm and grasped the door handle. But then he felt a strong hand grasp his shoulder. His bad shoulder.  
"Vernon..."  
  
(*I was really tempted to leave ya here.......I really wanted to.....but then I realized how short the chapter would be.)  
  
"That's right boy. Did you really think you were out-that I would leave that easily? Well, that proves how very stupid you are," he was smirking at Harry but not looking directly at him. His eyes were moving around in his head showing how very drunk he was.  
"Go on boy. I dare you. Get down and beg," Vernon said. He pushed the boy to the ground. Harry's eyes suddenly looked as though they were set on fire. He slowly began to stand up. Harry was shaking slightly from the amount of pain. He stood tall though. He knew, just as he knew in the graveyard with Voldermont, that he wouldn't die begging. This was going to happen weather he liked it or not and begging would only add to Vernon's sick happiness.  
"I will not beg for my life from you Vernon. You have given me nothing. Nothing! You've ruined my life, but of course, that's exactly what you wanted. You've been waiting for this day Vernon. I knew it would probably come ever since I came home. Go on. Kill me Vernon," Harry was tall and straight backed. His voice was hardly above a whisper, hoarse and dry but strong and deadly. His uncle's eyes showed anger.  
"If it gets you to shut that trap of yours," his uncle once again raised his gun and then smirked eviliy. He lowered the gun and his eyes were shining insanly.  
"What-are you afraid Vernon?" Harry was beyond compromise. he wouldn't play along but something in his uncles eyes was driving him crazy.  
"No boy- I simply realized that shooting you would give you a quick death," Harry's eyes suddenly flickered from pain back to anger. He knew this was going to hurt. He stood however, tall and straight. His uncle rounded on him and punched Harry in the stomach before he could move. He doubled over as his uncles hand collided with his head. He fell to the ground. His uncle was still grinning insanly and lifted Harry's face to his own.  
"I'm giving you another chance boy- beg. Beg for your life and I may spare you," Vernon's face swam in front of Harry. He considered it. Maybe he would be able to escape. But then, a voice screamed in his head bringing him back to his senses. 'DON'T YOU DARE!'  
"Bring it on Vernon. Bring it on," and Harry was once again standing, out of his uncle's reach as he stood alone and on the verge of getting killed.  
His uncle lunged at him pushing Harry to the ground. Harry punched him back. Vernon then did something Harry didn't expect and he picked him up and threw him across the room into the same spot he had hit before. He felt his ehad hit with the wall and somewhere, he heard a gun shot whiz by his head. Then he heard the familar sound of a spell. Harry reached out his head and groaned.  
"Bring it on Vernon. Bring it on," Harry mumbled and he blacked out. 


	3. The Scene Through Somebody Else's Eyes

A/N: This is a short chapter just to show you what was going on through the persons mind. Mind you, I probably wouldn't have just sat there-but there had to be a way for Harry to say bring it on cause i love htat line. hehe. well I know, there probably isn't a Floo powder network connected to Hogwarts cause that'd be too eaasy for Voldie. But, for my sotry's sake, lets pretend, ok? Let's go through this again. I don't own any Harry Potter characters but of course, that is kind of obvious, isn't it? Cya!Oh! I almost forgot! Please review!  
  
  
'I can't believe this. Harry hasn't answered any letters. Hedwigs been acting strange. Good thing Ron owled me and I had enough sense to owl Dumbladore and not Harry. But now, I get to find out whats going on. This should be interesting.' Sirius thought.  
Sirius Black walked along the street as a black dog next to Remus Lupin. They were walking quickly, both very curious to see what was going on with Harry.  
But what they saw, they weren't prepared for.  
As they crept up to Harry's window, they saw their fist piece of evidence that something was horribly wrong. Harry's blood all over and it was a trail of blood. Sirius quickly changed forms and clamered in the window.Remus followed closely behind. They strained their ears and listened to the commotion that was downstairs.  
"No boy- I simply realized that shooting you would give you a quick death." That was the voice of Harry's uncle. Sirius was ready to leap out and strangle the man but Remus flung out a hand and whispered "Not yet. we don't know what's going on yet."  
They crept down the stairs just enough to be able to see Harry and his uncle. They watched as Harry stood proudly and glared at his uncle.  
"Bring it on Vernon. Bring it on." Sirius watched in horror as his godson was taking his death freely, his eyes radiating a sense of power he hadn't seen in anybody but Dumbladore.  
Both men were too horror-struck to move. They were paralyzed at their spot on the stairs. But then, the action of Vernon bringing his gun out once more caused them to be snaped back to realility.  
Sirius jumped out as Vernon shot the gun. "SUPFREY!" The man tumbled to the ground and they ran towards Harry who was mumbling.  
"Bring it on Vernon. Bring it on." and they watched as he blacked out. They faced each other, Sirius ready to kill.  
"To Hogwarts," and Remus conjured ropse to bind Harry's uncle and they walked over to the fireplace.  
"Hogwarts!" Sirius shouted with Harry in his hands. Remus then followed with Vernon floating along side him.  
'I can't believe this. I can't believe this.' Sirius Black was staring at his Godson with pain. His mingled body was so skinny from lack of food and he was hardly breathing.   
"Don't give up on me now Harry." and they arrived at Hogwarts facing the teachers table who were gasping and crying out at the sight of them. 'Good thing it's only the teachers and no students yet,' Sirius thought. 


	4. Harry's Thoughts.

A/N: This is basically Harry's thoughts while he's unconcious. The song is by Linkin Park ~Crawling. I own absolutly nothing. THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS! PLEASE KEEP REVIEWING! YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME! OH, AND I LOVE TO HEAR SUGGESTIONS! THANKS!  
  
  
  
  
Crawling in my skin  
These wounds, they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real  
  
  
  
"What happened?" Albus Dumbladore asked as he sat next to the raven haired boy. Sirius was white and staring at Harry. Remus, who was pacing explained. Professor McGongall was in there and her lip was twitching as she listened. Snape was unreadable as he sat. Hermoine and Ron had arrived, both pale as they watched the boy's chest go up and down slowly. They were both in shock.  
"His uncle beat him up real bad," that was all Remus could get out. He was shaking almost as white as Sirius. Dumbladore looked at him sadly and stood up.  
"Remus, do you mind giving me your hand?" Remus slowly reached out his hand and Dumbladore takes it.  
"Do not panic. I have to see this for myself," Dumbladore reaches into his pocket and grabs his wand while holding Remus's hand still. He presses his wand against Remus's palm and a bright yellow light blinds them all. Then, they are struck with the images of Harry's fight.  
"I'm giving you another chance boy- beg. Beg for your life and I may spare you," his uncle's voice echoed through the hospital wing. They watched as Harry stood and greatly took his death with open hands. And when they were finished, Harry was turning a pale white color. Almost the color of a ghost. They all gasped as he began choking for air.  
"Poppy!" DUmbladore yelled. The nurse ran in quickly and shook her head sadly while feeling his head.  
"He'll be all right. Hopefully. There's nothing more any of us can do but wait and hope he's strong enough," she left them. Sirius walked over and placed a hand on Harry's hand. Then, Harry's body, as though electrocuted was thrown into the air and back down onto the bed again.  
He then began turning a sickly pale green color. His wounds began shinning a deep gold color, so bright, it hurt their eyes to look at it too long.  
Harry then has one tear slide down his cheek. But it wasn't ordinary. The tear was a shimmering red. His scar was suddenly turning black.  
"My gosh. Albus-what's going on?" Mcgongall was horrified looking at the boy. Dumbladore was just as stunned as her.  
"I don't know. I don't know." Dumbladore was staring at the boy in complete shock.  
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface  
Consuming, confusing  
This lack of self control I fear is never ending  
Controlling  
  
Harry was recalling everything that had happened to him. He was little. Being thrown into a cupboard. His heart broken everytime he was thrown and Dudley was kissed. Why? Why him? What did he do? 'It's my birthday. Not his.'  
It was Margie. He couldn't stand this. Why couldn't she just leave him alone? What did he ever do to her? Doesn't she understand that I'm dying inside? I'm the one with no parents. I don't even care anymore. Couldn't they just leave him to himself? Then maybe the pain would take less time in eating him alive.  
No-Not Ron too. Why? I hate this. Doesn't he understand that he's the lucky one? Doesn't he realize that I'm dying? I thought at least he might understand. Please-this has to be a terrible nightmare...  
I can't seem  
To find myself again  
My walls are closing in  
(Without a sense of confidence I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)  
I've felt this way before  
So insecure  
  
Voldermont was taking over and all he could feel was pain. his fault. It was all his fault. Why was he even alive? He didn't deserve to live. Sirius didn't deserve Askaban, he did. He killed a person. Someone who was innocent. Damn it, why did he even bother? He was useless. Harry was alone once more.  
Crawling in my skin  
These wounds, they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real  
  
The pressure was killing him. His uncle wanted him dead. Harry wanted himself dead. he didn't deserve to live. He was a pain, no good. His uncle knew it, Harry knew it. Damn, the whole world knew it.   
  
Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me  
Distracting, reacting  
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection  
It's haunting how I can't seem...  
  
To find myself again  
My walls are closing in  
(Without a sense of confidence I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)  
I've felt this way before  
So insecure  
  
As Harry stood and stared at the gun, he felt relief. Finally, I'll be gone. Yet another part wanted to fight back. To much pressure. To much pain. It's finally going to go away. And I'll finally get to fight my uncle. It couldn't get much better.  
  
Crawling in my skin  
These wounds, they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real  
  
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface  
Consuming, confusing  
This lack of self control I fear is never ending  
Controlling (Whispered during chorus)   
  
(~Linkin Park- Crawlin) 


	5. Harry's finally awake....is that good?

A/N: O.K., I know, this isn't long. It's relaly short. But I just finished writing it and I figured why not? Your lucky I uploaded 2 chapters in one day :). well thanks for all your reviews! Your all awesome! OH AND IF ANY OF YA WANT TO KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON WITH HARRY DURING THIS CHAPTER AND WANT A SEPERATE CHAPTER THEN ADD THAT IN YOUR REVIEW AND I'LL MAKE IT JUST FOR YOU! (2 OR MORE PEOPLE HAVE TO WANT IT)! PLEASE REVIEW, THANKS AND I'LL TRY TO GET THE NEXT CHAPTER UP SOON. Why am I typing in all caps? No idea... Well, you know, I don't own anything and you know that. Would they actually sue me? Wait-I don't want to know the answer to that. I'm gonna shut up now.  
  
Harry was shaking as he layed in the bed. Sirius, who was sleeping was startled awake and stared sadly at the boy. He had been out for pratically 2 weeks now. Sirius had not left the bedside. The term had started and since Harry had not woken up, students had been trying to sneak in to see what was happening with him. Dumbladore had told the school about Harry. Sirius remembered how Ron and Hermoine had been forced to go back to classes after missing a week. Sirius didn't care if he didn't ever see the light again as long as Harry would be ok. He had been told that Harry was getting better. In Madam Pomfrey's words : "It's as though his body refuses to recover."  
  
  
  
  
The moonlight danced across Harry's face showing the face of a fifteen year old boy that had ancient lines in his face as though he had been alive for fifty years. The bruises and cuts were sharpened on his face unable to be fixed by Madam Pomfrey for unknown reasons. Sirius recalled hearing something about his body rejecting it. Sirius also remembered hearing the same day that if Harry awakened, his mind might not be able to take in all the events sanly. Dumbladore put it this way, "Harry will either wake up and accept it, or his body will deny it and that effect could take serious effects and tolls on his body and mind."  
  
  
Harry, why won't you just wake up?" the shaking body stopped and stayed still. Sirius was watching him, as thought expecting something. Sirius sighed after 10 minutes and layed his head back down on Harry's bed. He wasn't down there for long because Harry's body suddenly shot up and Harry was choking for air, his scar burning a black and red color mix on his forehead.  
  
  
"Madam Pomfrey!" Sirius yelled. Harry turned his head towards the man and his eyes hardened slightly. Then he got off his bed and was looking around frightened.  
  
  
"Harry-it's ok. Sit back down," Sirius was trying to calm him. Harry's eyes widened and he backed up into the wall, his body shaking from the cold and terror.  
  
  
"Harry! Harry your awake!" Madam Pomfrey entered and rushed over to him. Remus awoke from the corner and immediatly sat up straight. "It's ok Harry-you did to get back to bed now."  
  
  
Harry's eyes hardened more now and he backed into a corner. His breath was rapid and his head was darting around as though expecting someone or something to attack him.  
  
  
"Remus-go get Dumbladore," Remus ran out the door and disappeared. Harry meanwhile had curled up into a ball in the corner and had his head covered in his arms. Two minutes later ron, Hermoine, Dumbladore, Professor McGongall, and Snape all came rushing in. They stopped when they saw Harry. All stood frozen as they stared. He was rocking himself back and forth. Dumbladore was the first top approach him.  
  
  
"Harry-it's going to be ok," Harry raised his head from his hands and his body off of the ground. He's eyes were blazing with anger, his body slightly trembling. His eyes darted towards the door, then at Sirius, Remus, Ron, Hermoine, McGongall, Madam Pomfrey, Snape and then Dumbladore again. He was glaring at them all as though he hated their guts. Madam Pomfrey began approaching the trembling figure and he began moving away. She still, approached and they all moved closer. Harry was loosing it. His head was screaming for him to get out. The images wouldn't leave. he saw their faces and hated them. He threw Madam Pomfrey's hand off of him and bolted out the door. 


	6. The Voice

A/N: Blah blah, blah. I don't own Harry Potter or anything. You know that, I know that, and yet, I'm forced to write these stupid things. Enjoy the story and please Review! (THANKS TO EVERYONE THATS BEEN REVIEWING! IT MEANS A LOT!)I'm sorry this is so short. I'll try to get the next part by tomorrow since I have another half day..... I'm writing this as I go BTW so that is why it's taking so long...  
  
  
Harry was running and he couldn't stop his legs even if he wanted to. His head was pounding from the pain in his scar. He ran past kids in their classes. He heard Sirius running after him as a dog. Harry ran forward. His head was suddenly feeling dizzy. He was going to faint. He heard voices all around him as he came to a sudden halt and he grabbed his head in pain. He saw all their faces and they grabbed his arm.   
  
  
Again, he had flashbacks. He didn't even have to look up. He had thrown them all off without even moving. A huge red blast of light blinded them all and as though someone was shoving them, they were all thrown into the wall. Harry's head was reeling.  
  
  
"Harry-" Hermoine said weakly. Harry looked up and although he didn't know it, everyone else did. Harry's body was healing. All his cuts were suddenly gone except for the scar that laid on his forehead.  
  
  
"Why won't you people just leave me alone? All I wanted was to die." Harry's world swirled before his eyes and he fell to the ground.  
  
  
  
Harry wasn't at Hogwarts anymore. A white room was all he saw. Harry suddenly jumped as someone else began talking.  
  
  
"Hello Harry James Potter," the voice said. Harry spun around and only saw the white room. Harry shook his head and began rubbing it.  
  
  
"Your loosing it Potter," it was the voice again. Harry was suddenly angry.  
  
  
"Who are you," he asked. The voice began laughing. Harry was loosing his patience.  
  
  
"I'm surprised. Your parents were much smarter. Maybe that was because they were perfect," Harry was balling up his fists in anger.  
  
  
"All right. We can play this game Potter. You were going to try to kill yourself. Do you mind telling me why? Why, when everyone wishes they were you?" Harry was mad, but listening intently. He didn't speak.  
  
  
"No?" the voice was mocking him slightly and Harry was in no mood to deal with this.  
  
  
"Heroes are chosen. They do not wish to be heroes," Harry spoke to silence.   
  
  
"Hm. Harry Potter, have you ever told anyone? Do you know that right now, there are little boys wishing they-themselves- were you and you, you Harry Potter, are wishing to be them. How very ironic this situation is. Harry Potter- do you happen to know what you are?" the voice asked. Harry didn't move, didn't speak.  
  
  
"I am Harry Potter. I'm a boy. The Boy Who Lived," he responded. The voice laughed again.  
  
  
"Right! That is the name everyone is accustomed to. But you are more then that Potter. Have you ever heard of the 'Prophecy of Life?' The prophecy which involves you more then anyone else?" the voice was curious. Harry was clueless.  
  
  
  
"Ah yes, what a prophecy it is. Yet, I don't remember, in all the ways I've read, I don't remember a part were the Boy Who Lived tries to kill himself." 


	7. Screams

A/N: Hey! O.K., first I have to say THANK YOU TO EVERYONE THAT HAS REVIEWED! YOUR AWESOME! Another thing, I won't be able to post until the weekend(sorry!) but I have this audition thing for a band and I have to practice my clarinet. wish me luck! Oh, i won nothing, blah blah blah. I'm open to suggestions!  
  
  
"I didn't try to kill myself," Harry heard hiimself say. He was once again listening to the laugh of the voice.  
  
  
"You weren't exactly trying to protect yourself, were you? You know, Harry Potter, that you could have killed him, without a wand. So, why didn't you? Were you afraid? Tired of being brave? I don't blame you Harry Potter."  
  
  
"I'm not tired. I'm not afriad," Harry said steadily.  
  
  
"Then why, why did you try to kill yourself," Harry was getting angry. He didn't even know who this was.  
  
  
"You tell me who you are," the voice was sighing and Harry thought he had won.  
  
  
"I'm very dissapointed that you don't recognize me." Harry was suddenly confused.  
  
  
"What are you talking about?" Harry asked. The voice was silent and Harry was thinking as hard as he could. Who was this?  
  
  
"Oh my gosh-" Harry was suddenly backing up his eyes wide and in shock. The voice was still silent. Harry was looking around wildly around his heart beating rapidly.  
  
  
"What's wrong Harry?" the voice was haunting. It was tormenting Harry with his voice.  
  
  
"You know, I didn't want to show you this, but I think it's something you need to see," a scene was suddenly playing in front of Harry's eyes. it was Sirius. He was staring at Harry's body in fear and pain. Remus too was staring at him. Dumbladore's eyes were no longer twinkling. Hermoine and Ron had not been recognizable.  
  
  
"What's going on?" Harry asked. he was watching them closely looking for any sign that they didn't care.  
  
  
"Oh, they do care. very much. As for whats going on? This is whats going on during this very moment. Their all waitng for you Harry Potter."  
  
  
"No. I can't go back to the way things were. Nobody understands. not even you. It's my fault. Why doesn't anyone realize that if I wasn't alive the people I care about would be alive? Why doesn't anyone care? Why is that everytime something seems good in my life, I'm brought down once again? How come nobody recognizes me anymore?!" Harry was suddenly yelling. He was swirling in his thoughts. Was he going insane? He didn't know. He was pulling his hair as he fell to his knees in pain. It was his scar again.  
  
  
"No! Please-Not again! What did I do this time?" he was yelling again but now there was no voice. Nobody to talk to. Only the silence. He was yelling so loudly that he was sure everybody could hear him.  
  
  
Back at Hogwarts, Dumbaldore, Hermoine, Ron, Sirius, and Remus were listening as the boy was screaming.  
  
  
"NOBODY UNDERSTANDS! NOBODY! HOW COME I'M THE ONLY ONE THAT WISHES THEY NEVER WOKE UP AGAIN EVERYTIME THEY FALL ASLEEP!" Harry didn't realize he was yelling in his sleep. The others however, were listening to his rant in silence, Hermoine crying silently.  
  
  
"NO-PLEASE-NOT AGAIN!" He was screaming. Hermoine screamed as the boy's scar began bleeding. His body was twitching and he was grabbing his hair. His eyes shot open and he stared into the eys of Sirius who had tears running down his own face.  
  
  
"Nobody understands," Harry was radiating his anger off his body. His eyes were blazing yet if you were to have looked long enough into his eyes, you would have seen the gleam of fear that laid there silently, and hiding trying to not let them see it.  
  
A/N: haha. I don't know if this chapter was any good. If it wasn't tell me and I'll write it over and repost it. I just finished writing it, so....well, i'd like to hear who everyone thinks the voice belongs to! put it in your review! later !  
~Corie 


	8. Images

A/N: O.K., I'm relaly sorry for not posting sooner. I had writers block and stuff, so you know how that goes. Well, thanks everyone for reviewing and please continue! I don't own any Harry Potter characters. And, I'm still kinda in writers block so if you people could help me out.....please? come on, im desperate (but not desperate enough to ruin this story and have snape run up in a pink tuto....ok ill stop giving u ideas.). I don't know where I'm going....well...I kinda do....hum de dum.... I'll say it again.... PLEASE READ AND REVIEW! I LOVE REVIEWS! PLEASE? I'LL BEG. OH AND IF ANY OF U HAVE THE LINKIN PARK CD OR THE SONG 'PAPERCUT' LISTEN TO THAT WHILE YOUR READING THIS. IT KINDA HAS AN EFFECT....well.....i said kinda.  
  
Paranoia struck Harry. He was constantly awake, he hadn't slept in days. His eyes were covered with dark circles yet his eyes seemed wide awake, afraid of closing. His whole body was hit with pain. He hadn't talked since the nightmare. Hadn't slept. Hadn't even eaten despite the constant bothers of everyone.  
  
  
He was raging a constant battle inside himself. Part of him was still the same person, still the same Harry, the person that everyone knew. Or thought they knew.  
  
  
The rest of him was taking over, a mix of rage and anger and fear. Harry had never felt this before. Something was pulling him deeper and deeper everytime he recalled his events.  
  
  
He had been kept inside the hospital wing, perhaps because everyone was afraid of him. And Harry didn't care. He was sick of everyone treating him like a freak. He hated his life.  
  
  
Even though he hadn't talked, they were still treating him as though he couldn't hear. And every time they would talk quietly about sending him to and insane asylum he would roll his eyes. If only they truly understood.  
  
  
He wanted to talk, to yell at them. But that's what they wanted. Sirius was forced to go back because people had begun to suspect. Harry didn't say good-bye, didn't even acknowledge his presence Harry was trapped. Trapped inside his own body.  
  
  
So maybe he was insane. It didn't bother him at all. What did bother him was the fact that he was deadly. This was mostly the reason he began pushing everyone away. He decided to not to care for anyone. Because, how can Voldermont kill his friends if he didn't have any? This was just another way to protect them...  
  
  
The voice had been haunting him. The voice that had been haunting him ever since it had happened. Cedric Diggory's voice would torment him in his sleep and everywhere he went.   
  
  
A new hot wave of anger rushed over him as he tried to block out anything that reminded him of what he had become. Of the monster he was. He knew how much anger he had lately, but he kept it inside. Nobody needed to know how much he wanted a family. How much he hated killing people. How he wished that life for him would end so that he wouldn't have to feel this way again. He was selfish and he knew it. But he didn't care. This was his life.  
  
  
He had Hermoine and Ron visit him. They would sit uncomfortably and look at him. As soon as he would look back, they would lower their gaze. He wouldn't talk, even if they started a conversation. 'They haven't visited in over 2 weeks though. That means their beginning to forget. Forget how close we were. It's finally working.'  
  
  
Harry had looked at himself in a mirror the other day. He had grimaced at his reflection. His scar had remained bloody, his body skinner then ever before. His eyes had been covered in dark circles. His green eyes had dulled over. They didn't even look the same. 'I don't even look the same. I can't even recognize myself.'  
  
  
His nightmares had made him afraid of going to sleep. They would start with a happy life of everyone he had ever 'killed' alive. Then, they would disappear and Harry was left in a graveyard as it rained. Their voices whispered in his ears. Sometimes he couldn't remember what they would say, but when he did remember, the voices would be yelling at him. Angry that he had betrayed them. Yes, that's what Harry was. A betrayer. Harry Potter the betrayer.  
  
  
The prophecy had left him confused too. He would have asked someone, Hermoine, Sirius, Dumbladore or even Ron. But he wasn't talking in an effort to keep them safe. But, when he thought about the prophecy, his mind would ring, like he remembered it from somewhere. Or maybe, he hadn't heard of it, just felt connected. And then, he would snort and yell mentally at himself for being so stupid. 'My gosh Harry. Your a complete basket case.'  
  
  
And he made up his mind. He was going to find some answers, weather they liked it or not. Harry Potter would not wait. 


	9. Escape and disappearance.

A/N: O.K. ok, sorry. This chapter is short, it's boring. Sorry! Maybe you'll like it. Hopefully....Well, PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW?! U GUYS ROCK! THANKS FOR REVIEWING SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!! AND IM DESPERATE! I HAVE DIFF. WAYS TO GO FROM HERE! U GOTTA HELP ME OUT!   
  
  
He waited until it was dark. Madam Pomfrey had just checked up on him, making sure he wasn't doing anything stupid. He wouldn't answer her questions and only stared blankly at her as she constantly pleaded. And the voice was talking to him in the back of his head again, 'What have you become Potter?'  
  
  
He shook off the feeling that he was being watched and slipped out the door without a sound. He could see the castle. He breathed as if smelling something beautiful. He then heard a creak of a door. That was enough to set him off.  
  
  
He began running faster then he ever ran before. He wouldn't go back. He couldn't. Not now. It was a prision. He had enough of it and even though he had made it clear to himself before he left that all he was do is go to the library, Harry Potter would not be returning to the white bed.  
  
  
Harry slowed to a walk and panted slightly. He had not run in so long. And a memory ached at him from the back of his mind. What he wouldn't do to play quiditech at a time like this. He shrugged. Maybe he would. All he would have to do is get his firebolt. But he didn't know the password. Well-maybe he would just steal a school's broom. They weren't using them right now anyways.  
  
  
But Harry turned the corner and entered the library slowly. He walked quietly making hardly any noise at all. As he began pulling books out, he decided to sit down in the corner and glance threw fast.  
  
  
On his last book, Harry looked in the index of the book, 'Prophecy's and What They Mean.' He was mumbling softly to himself, his ears straining for any sound that was his own.  
  
  
Then he stopped and pointed a finger at the name.  
  
  
"The Porphecy of Life. That's it!" he whispered to himself. He quickly flipped to the page and began reading. But he had not started quickly enough because he soon heard voices, angry voices. His eyes widened and he ripped the page out of the book. He heard the voices get closer...  
  
  
"How could he just disappear?" he recognized this voice. Sirius...he must be with Dumbladore...and probably Remus. 'I'm so dead,' he thought. They walked into the library as Harry slipped to the the far back.  
  
  
"Lumos," that was Remus's voice. Harry silently cursed. He knew that they would find him. They were too skilled at this sort of thing. He turned his head and he smirked. He was staring at a window. His escape. He knew he could never get there without making enough noise for them to hear. 'Just go. Run. They can't catch you.' And he legs ran before he could stop them. He heard a shout for his name but he wouldn't turn around. He was out the window, down the vines, he had reached the ground and he turned to see Sirius climbing after him. He didn't have much time. He ran. Ran faster then he intended to. His mind was realing.   
  
  
"Harry-Harry Potter?" it was the voice. Harry stopped dead and whirled around. Sirius was running at him, in his dog form. He would catch up any minute. Why weren't his legs moving? Why was he running at all? The dog suddenly transformed into Sirius Black, still running at him. Harry's eyes widened suddenly realizing he would get caught...He had to go. He wouldn't go back. He wouldn't.   
  
Sirius was suddenly wrestling him to the ground. Harry then felt something pull at the back of his mind. Vernon. This reminded him. The memories suddenly flooded threw his mind, torturing him. The cold nights. No parents. His mind was screaming. He was fighting back. He threw a shocked Sirius off and ran. Ran harder and faster then before.  
  
  
"HARRY STOP!" Harry was running afraid of what they would say-more afraid that they would want him back-afraid of what Voldermont would do to them. Afraid to accept the truth.   
  
  
Something was happening to him-he was falling. No-he was still standing. He suddenly grabbed his burning scar. and pulled his hands back quickly. He had felt a liquid-blood. He yelled and Harry Potter's body vanished from thin air.  
  
A/N: See? I can't continue until I know where I'm going. Email me with suggesitons or something.....please? 0:) 


	10. The prophecy and some discoveries

A/N: Hey! Sorry this took so long.....But, hey, MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! There isn't a lot of Harry in this- a lot of talking- ok, let me tell you, this is a boring chapter. sorry, but i kinda had to have someway to get it out of the way. i'm getting the next part up as soon as i can! you guys are awesome! keep reveiwing@!!!  
  
Harry's body feel limply to the ground and he felt his body get sore. He groaned softly and got up shakily. He then suddenly stopped, realizing he was no longer in Hogwarts. He turned his gaze to his surrondings.  
  
  
He was in a room that mirrored him, his own image stood staring at him, mocking him. His eyes narrowed and he closed his eyes, disgusted at the sight of himself.  
  
  
The mirrors suddenly all burst and glass was flying everywhere. Harry's yell was drown by the sound of laughing that run in his ears. Harry yelled again as the glass pierced his skin.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
Sirius Black stood staring at the spot, unable to move. He had vanished. Would he be coming back?  
  
  
"Sirius! Remus! Where is he?" Albus Dumbladore was walking briskly at them, his face pale.  
  
  
"Vanished," Albus Dumbladore's eyes suddenly widened and his expression changed to worry.  
  
  
"I think it is time for you to hear what Harry Potter really is. Come, Sirius, Remus, this will make for a terrible bedtime story, but you need to hear it," Sirius reluctantly followed his mind playing back the iamges of Harry fighting him.  
  
"He hates me," Sirius whispered. Dumbladore could only shake his head.  
  
  
"He does not hate you Sirius. Harry's just suffered something that has effected him greatly physically and mentally. It is nobody's fault but his uncle's."  
  
  
"Albus, what is Harry?" Remus asked, his eyes watching the headmasters every move.  
  
  
"Harry Potter is the key to defeating Voldermont. But that, I'm sure, most have all ready figured out." Sirius and Remus nodded, listeneing intently to his words.  
  
  
"When Harry was born, he was given a gift. The gift of something called: Junctum," he began. Sirius looked confused.  
  
  
"But I don't understand," Albus sighed and he looked older then ever before, his white ebard glinting in the moonlight.  
  
  
"It is latin, Sirius, for Unite. Harry Potter's gift was given and he was immediatly sought after by Voldermont. What dark wizard wouldn't think this baby was a threat? Why, by the time of one he had defeated the strongest of their kind they have ever seen. So they became worried."  
  
  
"But the thing is, the most amazing thing is, Harry was not only given the gift of Junctum, but also the gift to communicate with all living things, human or non. A gift that is feared by many, even I do not know the reason why so many are afraid. Perhaps a scare was brought up by the evil in an effort to try and shun Harry Potter from the wizarding world so that he would not be able to use his powers," Dumbladore stopped and watched the two grown wizards as they absorbed his words slowly.  
  
  
"So, Harry-he has the power to use these gifts..does he know that?" Remus asked. The headmaster shook his head no.  
  
  
"But he does know one thing. Harry knows something we do not. He has a gift I don't know if we could even understand and only he knows."  
  
Dumbladore stopped for a moment and looked out his window and lowered his head as he began looking for something in his desk. He pulled out a piece of parchement and took a deep breath.  
"Sirius, Remus, it is time that you hear what the prophecy says." He sighed as he began.  
  
It will happen when the one is young  
they will be hurt, and rewarded.  
The one will have won  
a battle that many loose.  
  
  
  
He will be locked away from our world  
until one day he is reunited again.  
After many years, he is accepted.  
  
  
But after many battles,  
the one will feel he fails.  
The one will not seem to be able to live.  
  
  
And his gifts are choosen for him:  
Junctum, the choosen language and another.  
And many will come   
to face him with fear.  
None ever wanting to near him.  
  
  
The evil fear him  
Knowing they can loose.  
Everyone knows he is strong  
But nobody knows  
if he is good or evil.  
  
  
And so, now he chooses  
evil or good?  
He has the choice.  
Neither side can afford to loose him.  
He has a destiny to win the battles.  
But for whichever he chooses-  
The One will win.  
  
A/N: O.K., the prophecy isn't what I wanted it 2 be, but that's the way it came out. Sorry it's bad.... would you review anyways??? please??? thanks!!!! 


	11. Changes

A/N: Hey everybody! I'm SOOOOO sorry this has taken so long. I really am! I'm trying to get the next part written soon. Here, read this and tell me if it's ok......  
  
  
Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing. And because of that I have to tell you that I'm stealing all these characters from JK just so I can write my story. I'll give them back as soon as I'm done. I think.......  
  
  
  
  
  
  
It was silence. Complete and utter silence. Harry awoke to that silence. He was quick to get up off the floor despite his injuries. He didn't know where he was until he looked around a little and he sighed heavily.  
  
  
The room was the same he had been in before. Harry groaned and waited for the voice. But it never came. Just complete silence.  
  
  
He needed the silence, he reasoned after a while. He couldn't remember the last time he had been alone and it had been silent. Alone with his thoughts. So, he sat back down.  
  
  
He started thinking about everything that had happened to him in his life. He remembered how lonely he always felt when he was young; lonely, but hopeful. He had been sad too, and afraid. But all that had changed when he went to Hogwarts. He was truly happy for the first time he could ever remember. He laughed again, and was hardly ever sad. Sure, Voldermont had been there, but it didn't matter because Harry had friends for the first time in his life.  
  
  
But then his fourth year came. He let somebody die. Harry knew he should have been smarter. They both should have been. Wouldn't the teachers have told them if the cup was a porkey? Besides, he had felt a deep sense of dread as soon as they had landed on that ground. He should have known. They should have gone back to Hogwarts. But instead, he had to figure it out. He had to keep investigating.  
  
  
And then the summer came and Harry felt completely lost again. He thought everything would be fine once he had come to Hogwarts, but his uncle didn't want Harry happy. So, the abuse that had stopped once Harry had gotten his letter, had started again, leaving Harry very much alone in the world.  
  
  
It was then, for the first time, Harry realized that he had let his uncle win. He had let his uncle win over the power Harry held once he was known as a wizard. He let him win, when he vowed to never let that happen. Besides that, Harry knew he was acting totally unlike who he was. He was never so angry in his life. And he was turning into his uncle.  
  
  
Harry bolted upright. His eyes pleading with the truth to be a lie. But he knew it was true. Harry had let his anger take him over just like his uncle did. He was changing in a way he never wanted to and never imagined.  
  
  
He held his head in his hands and quietly sobbed. He cried for the first time since he had gotten beat that summer. The tears didn't leave for an hour after they started. It was good to cry, Harry thought. He needed his other emotions back besides anger. 'If I can get sadness back,' Harry thought, 'there's got to be hope for me to be happy again.'  
  
  
"I'm killing myself," Harry said out loud. His tone had changed from the hard, cold voice he had grown accustomed to over the summer. Now, it was weak and tired. He felt so empty, so cold.  
  
  
"I wanna go home. I don't want to turn into my uncle," And Harry cried himself to sleep, acting totally unlike the teenager that he had become that summer. The teenager that felt nothing and let nothing hurt him because he had pushed everyone aside. But now? Now Harry felt nothing but guilt and loneliness that had been threatening to overtake him since he had begun stopping the emotions. He had hoped before that pushing everyone away would make everything easier and better. Now he saw that he was tearing himself apart and he was slowly falling into the same position that Voldermont had found himself in over 50 years ago. What was he doing? He knew he had to stop.  
  
  
The last thing Harry thought before he drifted into dreams, was that he hoped he could still be the boy he had once been before all the pain.  
  
  
  
A/N: Ok.....I dunno...that chapter kinda scares me, it's really weird.....this does NOT mean Harry is totally healed and better and normal. And it DOES NOT mean that Harry is back on the 'good' side. Things change. And I know this chapter was really short...I'M SORRY!  
I promise, later on in a different chapter, everything will be explained, so just give it time. I'm not just going to leave it at Harry has freaky powers. I'll get into them more if this story is still good and people still like it...And you know how I'll know if people like it?! REVIEWS!!! So, wanna drop one in my box and make me feel good??? Pretty please??? Oh, and here's some thanks to past reviewers! (I'm sorry, I'm only gonna do it for last chapter, and I feel like a ditz because I don't remember if I ever did this for other chapters... Sorry if I haven't thanked you for reviewing, but ya know I really appreciate it, right?) This would be thanks to the reviewers of chapter 10!! Here they are folks:  
  
  
Sophie W. -Wow! I guess you like it, huh? Well, I know it wasn't soon(Sorry! I really am!) but, I gave it to ya!  
  
Ratgirl: Thank you! OK, you want to know how Ginny,Ron, and Hermoine are effected by this, right? I just might do a chapter focused on them next. I might have to retrace my steps and go back in time, but I can do that....Good suggestion! Thanks!  
  
Lyn: Thanks! I personally thought the prophecy needed major help because I didn't try very hard and I think it came out horrible.. But I'm glad you don't mind it!!! Thanks, really. I didn't know the story was that great.  
  
Slinky: Thanks!!!!! LoL. running out of chapters would be a problem. But here! A gift from me to you! Another chapter!!!  
  
A Fallen Child: I'm glad you think it's interesting...I'm still not saying if Harry if good or evil yet... you'll find out eventually...Ah, the voice...hehe.... Haven't got many insights on that yet... Just as I said in the other Authors note, all the answers are coming and I'll try to get you the answers soon.  
  
MajesticAngel: Thank you!!! Do you really think its a good story??? I must sound like a bimbo because I keep asking that, but as you can see I don't really think I have very much talent.....I'm continuing and I'm starting the next chapter as soon as I finish these comments.  
  
Amy: Geesh!! I dunno about that! The prophecy was pretty pathetic....It actually made me laugh when I went back and read it....ok, I'm ok...Thank you so much for reviewing..  
  
  
Ok...Well, what can I say?! Just review more and tell me if the chapter was as sappy as I think it was.... By the way, I got a request for a Beta-reader for my other story, "Breaking Pont" if anyone's interested....maybe for this story too......  
Oh, and I got a comment that I need to learn how to indent...LoL. I DO know how to indent people. I just have a messed up computer with a messed up program that makes uploading very difficult and I have yet to learn how to make it stay indented when it's up for all to read.....Seriously. 


	12. NOTCIENot a chapter

**************************IMPORTANT*****************************  
  
I will not be updating this story for a very long time. It's on hold until further notice. I have half of chapter 12 written, but I have to stop for now. I will finish this story, but not for a while. Sorry to disappoint anyone, but I had to choose between this story and Breaking Point on which would be my main story. Since more people like Breaking Point, I have choosen to stop this story until further notice.  
  
Again, so for any inconvinence and I will update when I can find time to sit down and write this story again.  
  
~Until Next Time~  
  
Corie 


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